Hand in Mind
by Kurisutori618
Summary: The Doctor is not his younger self, but he's still her husband and he'll try for her. (This is on Darillum but on the Tardis near the beginning of 24 years.)


_This story was in my head for a long time, and I have lots of unwritten stories in my head for doctor who, but the thing is what is my head doesn't always sound as clear on paper or in this sense on computer so I hope you like this story._

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XXX

The Doctor was alone in the Tardis, casually scribbling notes on his chalkboard as he found it helps when he's thinking, unfortunately making his eyebrows fierce more than ever, that if you didn't know him personally you would think he was annoyed but really it just his face.

He had just finished an adventure with a crashed spaceship, a giant tin toy and finally being given another chance to see River, his beloved wife. His wife who hasn't seen in centuries since his last incarnation. A woman who knew everything about him and understood. He's happy that she does but also can't help being upset as well. Its why he's by himself right now.

He recalls back of the night after the wonderful carefully planned dinner and being together, she said later that evening they should get some rest and call it a night. As expected of himself, he couldn't help be nervous and excited, he could finally catch up the time he missed when he was lonely and missed her next to him at night.

They walked back hand in hand back into the Tardis smiling and content and it was perfect. What he didn't expect was what River did next.

"I hope you don't mind sweetie," gently letting go of his hand, "but think I should sleep in one of the guest rooms in the Tardis tonight."

"Okay..."

"Alone."

His smile quickly faded back to a frown paired with his heavy brow. Did he do something wrong? No he can't have!

"River... don't be ridiculous!, I think we are past that stage of our marriage if I recall and I don't see why we can't share a bed as we did before -"

"I made my mind Doctor," interrupting him "and honestly you'll be more comfortable, " she assured him with a soft pat on his chest and a small knowing smile and wrapped her fingers at the back of his neck to pull him down to her level to give him a quick kiss on his cheek said she'll see him in the morning and quickly pulled away out of his reach to her guest room taking her lovely warmth with her. He didn't know what to say after that. He was sure he did everything right down to the t.

And he should be happy on his wife appreciating his space, practically begged for it when anything that came his way of unwanted warm and fuzzy, but this is different, he spent too long without seeing River and bowtie was miserable like a puppy when he missed her and didn't want to go back to that feeling just yet.

No he needed to hold to that moment, how she made him feel when she revealed her face, framed beautifully with those gold curls he loved as they faced one another under the snow. How embarrassingly happy he was! Thinking this Christmas wasn't going to be so terrible after all!

They are married and they were great together in his last face. All bowtie and big chin and he knew it! They went on adventures and dates and she was very affectionate, _still_ is actually

" _Stupid Giant Tin Toy and pretty boy 2.0_ " the Doctor muttered thinking back, " _like hell I'm sharing with no one!"_

But this was _not_ on, he should be spending every waking and non - waking moment with that woman, and she's in _another_ bed!

After a long mental debate with himself of being better and ignoring his body's natural function to run away from holding or touching intimately at the back of his head. He wants River and his intimacy issues can _sod_ _off_ right now!

XXX

River blinked her eyes heavily to wake up properly by feeling her body being swayed by being held close to someone's chest, held under by her shoulders and thighs as if being carried.

"Sweetie what are you doing?"

As much as she loves him, she doesn't like to be interrupted from her beauty sleep. Not even for stern eyebrows. No matter how becoming they are.

"I'm taking you to your room!" the Doctor said in a determined tone, as he walked on.

"I was already in my room?" she said with a questionable brow.

"No... _our_ room!"

River was restless and no time to put up with his new quirks, "No come on now, Doctor put me back!"

He ignores her and he lifts her up a bit to secure his grip her, jostling her in the process, sending a good River Song glare his way along with a feeble punch to his chest to not do that again, that only just make him chuckle than be in pain much to River's annoyance.

"I'm realized, I never really slept in a bed in this body since I first regenerated in this form and never slept in a bed since then."

"What is your point exactly?" River said sleepily resting her head against his chest.

"I didn't see the point actually, soon learned standy up cat naps is more me this time!"

"Mm hmm" she murmured, humoring him half asleep in his arms as he kept walking ahead.

"But I realized the last time I ever slept in a bed and wanted to my sleep was because I had somebody to sleep with."

"Honey," she blinked tiredly, "If this is your way of asking for sex. I'm too tired and your uncomfortable habit of ' _particular'_ touching makes that also a problem."

" _No_ ….. _stop it!"_ in begrudging amusement, " I mean a reason to want to sleep like other beings without the extra shove of a telepath."

"Tried it once, it's not pleasant when someone else does it other than me." recalling a moment when Vastra tricked him to slumber against his will. Last time he's trusting a lizard!

"Sweetieee I'm tired and I miss my bed," she complained.

"And I'm chopped liver -" he mocked, "No can do sorry, ahh here we are… our room," he says as the door to a room opens automatically for him.

"Here we go River" as he gently sets her down on her back on their bed, he never set foot in since he last saw her, but to start their 24 years together, he's going to change all that, she hummed happily as she met the bed, to curl herself on her side with her head in the comfy pillow with a smile. He flips a blanket over her body and she feels the edge on her other side dip with the new weight of another person.

"I have trouble sleeping here," he said, uncharacteristically shy as he made himself comfortable lying next to her. "It just felt wrong," he said. It was wrong because he didn't have her with him.

River felt him entwine his fingers with her own. "But if I can hold your hand. Maybe with time, I could sleep better, and I can get over my - "

She cut him off with a kiss on his cheek, "Doctor.. do shut up and sleep" she mutters but grips his hand in a brief squeeze in understanding and drifts off fully to sleep.

"Okay dear shutting up now."

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 _Author's note_

 _I like to acknowledge his character traits of not wanting to be touched and how its easily swept under the rug in some stories despite how well written they are, so this popped in my head to write. Its probably not really good but oh well thanks for reading._

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Review feedback:

 _Guest 1 - Thank you, so much! I'm still getting the hang of writing the 12th doctor, though I'm glad you liked it! :)_

 _Guest 2 - River makes 12 be adorable, even when he's being stern and grumpy and when together, I guess even more adorable haha! I have written more 12/river but its not ready yet and need my beta to go over it. :)_

 _Guest 3 - River won't let the doctor get away! haha! of course she won't, they are going to spend 24 years together! But I wanted this River in this story to be more sensitive and aware of the Doctor problem of certain touch and they only spend or in this scene the first night together. Its not just gonna happen! I want to be gradual. :)_

 _Guest 4 - Thank you!_

 _Malady Pond du LesHeuresRoses - No you do make sense hah! Thank god! I think I would have missed my mark if I made it overly sweet. Other wise that's not my writing XD I'm glad you think my writing fits the 12th Doctor's character, he's not really easy to relate to then the 11th. I'm glad you liked the line! :D_


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